“A rejection is nothing more than a necessary step in the pursuit of success.”

                                                                                                    Bo Bennett

Rejection.

In life, regardless of your status, everyone will be stung by the rejection bug at one point or the other! FACT!

Establish this one truth, YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!  

People reject others for different reasons, and you cannot control people’s emotions and how they react to life. We still live in a world coloured by prejudices of various hues. Even if someone is downright rude, nasty or annoying, we can all learn to be more gracious. Become better than playing the rejection game. 

So you were rejected…   Don’t own the overwhelming flood of negative adjectives that spell rejection. Don’t let them define you. Stop them before they camp in your thoughts and become the person you see.  You can with the right attitude.

Without belittling the real, raw wound, it is not the end of the world. Look at it this way, it is an opportunity for refinement.  Allow it to make you better, not bitter.  Don’t spend too long mourning the loss of your self-esteem.    More than anything, it is our self-esteem that takes the hardest bashing.

Instead of sour grapes and revenge, take a long hard look in the mirror that can never lie, the Word of God, if what you see is not the true image of who you were created to be, adjust yourself. You may even look right, let that be a comfort.  Only allow yourself to walk away from the experience determined to build people up than tear them down.

I have learned that there is a lesson in every experience, good or bad.  The rejection pill is never an easy one to swallow. Trust me, I know! I remember when I swallowed one with the potential to be bitter.

Was it hard? Mmmmm … It wasn’t too hurtful.

I wrote an organization that I so longed to blog with in the hope of being accepted as a guest blogger.  I was not. Put bluntly, rejected! In fairness to them, their response was not worded to sound like rejection.  Their note was inspiring. Grace spilled from their words.  I felt built up than torn down. This is a fine example of how to say no if someone is not a fit for you.

The episode motivated me to enrol in a writing mentorship program – BLAST, where the maxim “develop a thick skin” could not have been overemphasized.  I began to pay more attention to my writing, improving my craft.  I did not drift into writing, it is a calling for me and I am passionate about every word I write. It would be cowardly to give up because of that one instance of rejection.  For sure, many more will come! That’s just the way the cookie crumbles.

You have a life to live.  You are excited about what you carry inside, who you are; but you just may not be someone else’s cup of tea! Not because something is wrong with you, maybe you’re just not their kind of person. Hear this, and I don’t mean to be mean, not everyone will like you! That’s O.K.

Does that mean you’re not good enough?  No.  It just means there’s more room for growth. Become the best you that can be. A more expanded version of you that makes room for others. Learn to quickly forgive, L.E.T I.T G.O and move on.

Step on those rejection rocks, rise higher and become better at what you do or who you were created to become.  Holding grudges or becoming bitter only festers the poison.  They, more often than not, move on or won’t even remember you afterwards. Someone described unforgiveness as “drinking rat poison, hoping the rat dies.”  You’re the only one carrying the hurt and the pain.  You shouldn’t create space for such toxicity in your life.

Step on those rejection rocks, rise higher and become better at what you do or who you were created  to become.                                                                                                                           -Bosede Santos

Back to my story, I wrote back to the organization. I thanked them for their kindness and craved the indulgence of their time to shed more light on their reasons for the rejection.

You have been called for a special reason and season, and God will connect you to those who will help you grow and get to the next level of your life purpose. I know. It’s happening to people I know. God is setting them up to take them to the next level! Amazing set-up stories I read and hear. ‘God-winks’ (got that from Gail Hyatt). 

He did the same for David. (Read the story in 1 Chronicles 12). He put together the most skilled army in the ancient world for him. People are rising up every day to follow their dreams and God is orchestrating the most amazing symphony with their stories.  

No rejection should stop you from being all that you were born to be in life.  God has a plan and purpose for everyone of us, and He will equip you with all that you need when you’re submitted to His will.

Go on, press in! Pull yourself together, mount that steed and ride in victory to your winning life as you:

• Review – Look at the circumstance surrounding the episode. Be real and objective; assess without sentiments. That’s the only way you can become better.

• Reposition – When you have objectively identified what you may have contributed to the incident, make the necessary physical, mental and/or emotional adjustments.  Apologize if you need to.  If it is obvious that they have the issue, take the high road, forgive! 

• Replace – For every negative, there is a positive.  For every lie, there is a truth. Replace the negative adjectives, through which you’re wont to naturally process the hurt and pain, with positive ones. Always remember, you are the image of a perfect God. He took His time to form you. You are special no matter what anyone says or even how you feel.

• Regain – Recover your morale and with the insight gained from your repositioning, get back to doing life as a new and improved version of you. Don’t ever empower anyone to belittle you or stop your destiny! 

… but those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31 HCSB)

Your Response:

How have you overcome rejection lately? How did God turn it around for your good? How did you grow through it?